dating-advice

5 Pieces of Bad Dating Advice Exposed

Has bad dating advice left you feeling vulnerable?

There is no shortage of dating advice out there from friends and family but what you need is a Singles Social Club – I’m talking a real life experience. Until you have the chance to enjoy a wonderful event with like-minded people.

The problem though is much of the advice you’ve recieved has been mistaken and based on personal experiences and opinions, rather than actual research about relationships. Below, I take on five common pieces of dating advice that are misguided or flat-out wrong.

This why you need a Social Club! Research shows that a lot of popular dating wisdom is wrong.

When You Meet The Right Person, You’ll Know Right Away.
One comforting piece of advice is that when the right person comes along, you’ll just magically know.
Maybe you’ll even experience love at first sight. Unfortunately for those romantics out there, the evidence suggests that there’s no magic. In a series of studies, Paul Eastwick and colleagues tracked people’s memories of various relationship experiences across the entire course of their relationships, both short-term and long-term. They found that early in a relationship, the timing of various relationship milestones (e.g., first kiss, first sexual encounter) and the strength of people’s feelings toward their partner was the same for both short and long-term relationships.
It was only later on that the researchers saw differences between relationships that lasted and relationships that eventually fizzled.

If You’re Interested In Someone, Play Hard To Get.
Many relationship advice books tell women that they should play hard to get if they hope to attract a man. According to this strategy, men like what they can’t have, so a woman should act uninterested in the man she desires.
Girls think that playing hard to get will make a guy like them, and being too available will turn him off. This isn’t true. Waiting a certain amount of time before texting him back and pretending to be busy when you’re not doesn’t get a guy to like you, it gets a guy to chase you. The problem with the chase is that it creates the illusion of having chemistry.

Focus On Putting Your Best Foot Forward Until You’re Firmly Committed.
Some dating advice suggests that the courtship experience should be approached as a game with the end goal of snagging a partner: Carefully monitor your behavior and the impression that you create in order to win the prize of a committed relationship. It’s true that first impressions matter and that you should generally be on good behavior on your early dates. Opening up too soon is generally viewed as socially inappropriate and is likely to turn someone off. But sometimes this advice goes too far.


Opposites attract, so try to find someone really different than you.
People often claim that opposites attract. Studies have found that people are
more likely to be attracted to and pursue romantic relationships with
individuals who are more like themselves across a broad range of personal
characteristics, including age,  religion , political orientation, and certain
aspects of  intelligence . Consider the 2014 research paper in which an international  team  of economists found that better-educated people tend to
marry other better-educated people—while individuals with less formal
schooling tend to partner with people of comparable educational levels.
Generally speaking, it appears, birds of a feather romantically flock together.


You’ll Only Meet Liars And Weirdoes If You Date Online.

Many people believe that everybody lies online. Online daters do sometimes
lie about their age and physical appearance. However, research shows that
extreme lies are rare because people who are looking to develop relationships
with those they meet online realize that such lies will eventually be revealed,
and when they are, it would likely spell the end of the relationship. There is
also a stereotype that people who use online dating are desperate because
they are unable to get a date “in real life.” Contrary to this picture, research
shows that there are almost no personality differences between people who
date online and those who don’t. In fact, one study found that people who met
their spouses online were more likely to be of higher socioeconomic status
than those who met offline. When you’re on the dating market, be yourself,
don’t chase after your polar opposite, don’t expect to instantly know if you’ve
found “the one,” and don’t be afraid to try online dating.

Click on the image below to view our next social club!


social-club-perth-1

social club perth 570x319

Self-Esteem and Successful Relationships

Self-Esteem and Successful Relationships

Research has well established the link between good self-esteem and relationship satisfaction. Self-esteem not only affects how we think about
ourselves, but also how much love we’re able to receive and how we treat
others, especially in intimate relationships.

“Low self-esteem can make you test or sabotage relationships that have potential, or settle for relationships in which you’re treated in a way that matches your beliefs about yourself,” says clinical psychologist Suzanne Lachmann, Psy.D.

People with high self-esteem are aware of the fact that to maintain a successful relationship; inner happiness is all that matters. And to keep up with that, one should know his self-worth, which has nothing to do with money,
education or health. Individuals who have a high level of self-recognition are acutely aware of themselves and what they want from a relationship. Before involving a long-lasting and positive relationship, he always starts by respecting himself.

He strives to know about himself and also if he is ready for the future consequences of involvement. Therefore, all the qualities mentioned above for a person with high self-esteem, make him stand out among the rest. Knowing their worth first, helps them to involve with a better understanding of a relation.

If you have low self-esteem you won’t be able to relate to others well. You may feel a lack of confidence in social situations. Your body language may be negative and you will not respond to others positively. Relationships you have had for a while can quickly go downhill if you suffer from low self worth. Even the best of friends will grow tired of someone who cannot help himself / herself. You may take on a victim mentality. This means you will blame everyone and everything for how you feel. You will not be able to relate to others well because you will act like a victim rather than an equal.

Why not complete the ‘Quizzes and More’s The Self Worth Quiz?



Once you’ve completed the scale, add together all of the numbers assigned to each response you chose, and review the appropriate feedback below.

If Your Score Ranged From:


10-25 –
Your score indicates that you have a fairly poor sense of your self
worth. And chances are that your ideas about yourself are not really
accurate – you may be focusing too much on the negative and ignoring the
many positive aspects of who you are as a person. Poor self worth is
something you should consider working on because it can interfere with your
interest in and ability to go after challenging goals. It can also make it more
difficult for you to find a healthy romantic relationship, with a partner who
values you as a person and who treats you well. Click here to learn more
about what you can do to work on developing a more positive sense of self
worth.

26-40 – Your score indicates that your sense of self worth is moderate – lower
in some areas and higher in others. Although no one feels they’re the best at
everything (and, of course, no one actually is the best at everything), it’s
possible that some of your more negative feelings about yourself could be improved
by a change of focus, or working harder to accomplish certain goals.

41-50 – Your score indicates that you have a fairly positive sense of your self
worth. That’s great, because feeling this way can improve your ability to
successfully accomplish challenging goals, and to find and maintain a healthy
romantic relationship.

Healthy Self-Worth in Relationships
When you understand the influence that lack of self-worth has on your
relationships, you can take steps to change what stands in the way of a
meaningful and balanced relationship. A healthy sense of self-worth can
transform your life.

If you are looking to find a life long partner, join our Social Club for singles!