Do You Believe In Love At First Site

Do you believe in love at first sight? Renee Brown responds to interviewer Chris Ilsley.

Drawing parallels to the TV show Married at First Sight, 6pr radio host Chris’s guest was Renee Brown,  Matchmaker. Discussing the love versus lust dilemma, Renee Brown makes it clear that lust is in fact one component of what drives us to believe in love at first sight. Can couples that claim love at first sight make it work? Does love occur instantaneously or do couples fall slowly, comfortably in love and live happily ever after?

Rene Brown’s belief that primal urges drive us to choose people we want to date based on the fitness as a mate or their ability to breed and perpetuate the race.

So these feelings of lust that come upon us and drive us to chase the one we want are caused by chemical reactions within the brain. Brown says we need to call upon the brain at this stage to analyze the situation and make sure the person is right for us. So pay attention to the signals that the brain is sending you. Don’t ignore them. Basing your choices on looks only is a mistake.

Is the love at first sight crowd older?

Caller after caller professed their undying love for mates that they met and married after their first date. Some even proposed on the first date! Most had been married half a century or more. So what did Renee Brown attribute this to? She says well these are older people and they have values. Meaning they know how to stick it out when times are tough. Dating at the time these people were seeking a mate was not the marathon sport that it is now.

Have dating practices evolved?

Current dating practices have evolved into a much faster paced almost sport like event. We have speed dating, tinder and many other ways that didn’t even exist back then. Renee Brown says even in the current dating environment we need to use our brains to listen to what is going on and still use our values to help us make the proper choice. Again, we are just doing this at a higher speed now than ever before.

What about making a return appearance?

In the event that people are returning to the dating world for the first time in 20+ years, the differences now are so great that they are often shocked and don’t know where to begin. Chris lsley felt this was an excuse to stay married and Renee Brown chimed in that yes, they should work on their marriage.

Finally, how do we avoid the wrong person?

In one last question Chris asks Renee Brown how to avoid hook-ups with the wrong people? Again she let us know in no uncertain terms, use your brain! Take note of the red flags and pay attention. Don’t let lust drive your decision. Make sure to engage the brain and pay attention! Renee Brown is a current day matchmaker and appeared on the Chris Ilsley radio show to discuss the topic of Love at First Sight. Let Corporate Cupid help you avoid the wrong person and make the right match. We offer guidance, social events and fun.

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What to do on Valentines Day.. Both for Singles & Relationships

Valentine’s Day is here, and while many of us dream of chocolates, roses, and romantic getaways, if we’re not careful, the only thing we might get is a dose of disappointment and heartache.

Whether we are single or in a relationship, Valentine’s Day can be stressful. 40% of people surveyed say they have negative feelings towards the holiday, so if you do too, you are far from alone! Below is a Valentine’s Day Survival Guide to help you navigate the day so you are able to move beyond any negative feelings and enjoy it.

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  • Don’t forget 

I think that the worst thing a person could do on Valentine’s Day is forgetting all about it. Put it on your calendar in big red letters. And a few days before, make sure you put a reminder in your day planner or your smartphone. Planning ahead to implement some of the do’s on this list will involve some advance thought and effort.

  • Put things in perspective

Ask yourself what this holiday really means to you.  Just remember that since we were young, advertisers have shaped our concept of Valentine’s Day.  We have been inundated with images of cupids, fancy dinners, sunsets, and diamonds, and all this visual conditioning has created an expectation of what should be.  That formula has worked for marketers.  The industry generates more than 14 billion dollars in retail sales each year.  With that in mind, do some digging on what this day really means to you.  Discover what you truly value and come up with your own definition of the significance of Valentine’s Day. 

  • Don’t do the same thing you did last year

Even if it worked well, your partner will appreciate something new and different. She wants to know that you thought about her as you planned your Valentine’s Day gift or event.

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What to do on Valentine’s Day….If you are single

So if you’re single, why not celebrate you and that amazing ability you have to love. Love, in all its forms, is worth celebrating. Here are some ways to celebrate yourself this Valentine’s Day.

  • Focus on all the positive things in your life

Look around at all you have in your life. Look at your friends, your family, your career, your support network. You have lots to be really grateful for and lots of things to focus on that are positive and leading you in the right direction. If it helps, start a gratitude journal to help keep perspective.

  • Make yourself a fancy dinner

With the ridiculous prices at restaurants on Valentine’s Day, taking yourself out to a fancy dinner may not be worth it. Instead, try making a recipe you’ve always wanted to try — or order your favorite takeout meal — and breakout the champagne.

  • Organise a night out with other single friends. 

Find a positive group of friends and plan a fun night out together.  Do things you might not be doing if you were in a relationship: chose the place you want to go to, flirt with strangers, and stay out late.

What to do on Valentine’s Day….If you are in a relationship or married

One of the nicest parts of being in a relationship is having routines that you share together and love: Saturday mornings spent leisurely snuggled up together; going to your favourite neighbourhood sushi restaurant; or watching your favorite TV shows together. But becoming too comfortable in your routines can put your relationship at risk of falling into complacency and even boredom, which isn’t so great for your relationship. 

  • Do something new and adventurous together

Research has found that couples who experience new and exiting activities together have an increase in the quality of their relationship (Aron et al, 2000). Trying new things together brings back the feelings of excitement and the thrill that you felt when you first fell in love.

  • Use the day to strengthen your relationship 

Valentine’s Day is a great opportunity to take stock of the past year, and reconnect with your partner. Take some time to reflect on what makes your partner special, and write these things down in the card you’re going to give them.  I have always believed the message in the card is the most important part of any gift.

  • Incorporate Appreciation and Gratitude

One hallmark of committed, solid couples is an ability to show gratitude to one another (Gordon et al., 2012). When your partner feels appreciated, he or she will in turn be more likely to appreciate you and all you do for them. On Valentine’s Day, incorporate gratitude with a gift that shows your high level of appreciation. Say it in your card, in your gift (love vouchers are a classic), or write down how you feel in a poem or love letter.

  • Add an Element of Mystery or Surprise To Your Celebration

Research indicates that when people receive a gift that is unexpected or has an element of mystery surrounding it, they tend to feel more positively about the experience, and the happy feelings last longer, when compared to something they expect (Wilson et al., 2005). So for Valentines Day, add an element of the unexpected to your gift. 

  • Give a personalised gift from the heart 

More than anything, your partner wants to feel loved and appreciated.  If the two of you are exchanging presents, give a thoughtful gift that shows you have really been paying attention to your partner’s needs and wishes.  Often better than giving a material item is to plan a shared experience, such as a night out to the theater or a dinner at a special restaurant. The experience builds positive memories, which both of you will always share.

What matters on February 14, and indeed every day of your relationship, is that you feel loved, respected, cherished and cared about by someone whom you love, respect, cherish and care about. So talk it over with your beloved. Make something happen – together – that is as personal and loving as your relationship.

We hope you have a wonderful Valentine’s Day!

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5 Affordable Valentine’s Day Presents (that won’t cost you a thing)

Don’t feel bad that you haven’t ordered a dozen red roses a week before the big day. We are here to tell you about 5 affordable presents that won’t really cost you a thing!

If you are single and have a crush, it is the perfect excuse to inform them, or let the one you love know how much you love them. However you look at it, Valentine’s Day is a great reason to celebrate love.. or the start of it.

Whether you’re erratic for the day or a cynic, we’re sure you’ve got some love to give. You can decide to keep it local and enjoy a simple picnic, or maybe a fancy degustation dinner, regardless it is a great time receive a thoughtful gesture and inject some extra romance into your relationship.

Here are our top 5 affordable ways to say, “I like you” this Valentine’s day without breaking the bank!

1. Card: We all love receiving something thoughtful, and with a card you have to put your feeling to paper so it can be a great way to send a heart-warming romantic message, or go one level up with a poem! (Heart melts)
This avoids having to splash out the big bucks but its personalized.

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2. Food & Wine: Yes, Food! Food is the way to anyones heart. You can plan something cute with a styled picnic filled with a delicious platter and wine. Valentine’s restaurant rush, other couples, waiters and noisy distractions? Ordering a takeaway and creating an alternative setting is key (Add in extra romantic flare with a few scented candles)

3. Breakfast in bed: Food again, yes! This little jester might just be the perfect present! Start their day off with pancakes in bed, it’s incredibly romantic to have someone prepare this for you! A scrumptious breakfast in bed costs nothing and will melt the heart of your loved one. Want to jazz it up a little? Try adding a cute little rose to the breakfast tray.

4. Scavenger hunt: This is something you see in movies, all you need is a sticky pad and pen. Leave notes all around the house for your loved one to see reminding them of all of the wonderful things that you love about them.

5. It’s massage time: Start by stocking up on basic spa essentials, maybe some moisturizer or oils. Break out your old robes and take turns pampering each other with the kind of personal attention spas just can’t offer. Your spouse will appreciate the thought and the attention.

We hope you have a wonderful Valentines Day, whatever you do!

Click on the image above to find out more about our Social Club for Singles.